Come as You Are

"Treat cultural messages about sex and your body like a salad bar. Take only the things that appeal to you and ignore the rest. We’ll all end up with a different collection of stuff on our plates, but that’s how it’s supposed to work. It goes wrong only when you try to apply what you picked as right for your sexuality to someone else’s sexuality."

— Emily Nagoski, Come as You Are (2015)

Come as You Are
Full title	Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life
Author	Emily Nagoski
Language	English
Subject	Women's sexuality; Sex education; Health & fitness
Genre	Nonfiction; Self-help
Publisher	Simon & Schuster Paperbacks
Publication date	3 March 2015
Publication place	United States
Media type	Print (paperback); e-book; audiobook
Pages	400
ISBN	978-1-4767-6210-4
Website	simonandschuster.com

Chapter summary

This outline follows the Simon & Schuster trade paperback edition, revised and updated (2 March 2021; ISBN 9781982165314). Chapter titles and part structure per library catalog record. First U.S. edition metadata: Simon & Schuster Paperbacks (2015), xi+400 pp.; ISBNs 9781476762104 (pbk.) and 9781476762098 (hc).

I – The (Not-So-Basic) Basics

🧬 1 – Anatomy: No Two Alike.

🎛️ 2 – The Dual Control Model: Your Sexual Personality.

💍 3 – Context: And the "One Ring" (to Rule Them All) in Your Emotional Brain.

II – Sex In Context

🧠 4 – Emotional Context: Sex in a Monkey Brain.

🌐 5 – Cultural Context: A Sex-Positive Life in a Sex-Negative World.

III – Sex In Action

⚡ 6 – Arousal: Lubrication Is Not Causation.

💗 7 – Desire: Spontaneous, Responsive, and Magnificent.

IV – Ecstasy For Everybody

🎆 8 – Orgasm: Pleasure Is the Measure.

🧭 9 – Love What's True: The Ultimate Sex-Positive Context.